- Dude, glass windows, not planets!
- — The Elite Hippie
- short short short.
- — verticlly challenged Elite
- Wort wort wort. Worty wort wort wort. Wort wort wort wort wort, wort wo-rt wort wort. Wort wort wort wort, wort wort wort wort wort wort...WORT WO-RT WORT WORT! WORT WO-WORT WORT WORT WORT! Wort wort wort wort wort.
- — The Sanghelios national anthem in Wortish.
- Court Court Court
- — An Elite Lawyer
- You have done something other than be exceedingly violent to your enemies. you and all your relatives must die for your dis0-honour
- — Typical Elite dialogue from the books
are the sad result of an xenomorph and Dr. Octopus and are one of the most kick ass troops in the Covenant. They kill the traitorous Brutes, and they kill evil Jackals and save the humble Grunts. They nearly killed the Prophets in the past, and somehow, this created the Covenant. They are known to speak their native language of wortish.
The Sangheili came into existence when a Xenomorph queen and Doc Octopus started gettin' it on. That's all you need to know about that. Their vocabulary mostly consists of the simple word wort, and are also known to say "damn it!" and when they see master chief and are startled. This is because at some stage of their evolution, they had a tendency to grow warts. They then proceeded to make sure everyone else knew about it, and now is their main form of language. Their language might be adopted to learn in school, but it might result in something bad. Wortish is very useful in communicating in code, but some worts sound exactly like another, meaning a different word. This could be humorous at times, such as when saying "Retreat!" translates to "GET TO DA CHOPPA!"
Like mentioned before, the Elites have four mouth prongs, with un-brushed teeth on each of them, which makes it hard to eat stuff. Why they didn't change to a healthy alternative (like smoothies and salads) is unknown. Their stomachs rumbling, the Elites are always pissed off. So pissed off, in fact, that they barely know who to side with. This is why they are also wannabe predators. They tried to join the Predator academy but couldn't hack it so they joined the Covenant instead. But, because that previous bit was nothing but filler, meant for you, the stupid reader, to keep reading, this completely unnecessary section isn't over yet. Anyway, Elites are lizards without tails, and for some reason, their knees bend the wrong way. They're really tall, and are pretty strong may because according to Halo 2, they are allied with gruntiness. They're cool, but for unknown reasons, do not wear pants. This grosses some people out, and would have most Elites arrested for indecent exposure, if they get erect, they're enormous juicy meaty really fucking big (I'm sorry, it's big) purple cock will stick out reaching above their chest, their only option is to jack that fucker off and shoot your pink jizz across the room. The ones seen in the bungie games (sadly (no homo)) have no testicles, just one big dick, but the 343 sangheili have a slightly shorter but thicker skin color cock, and 2 giant testicles, which can not retract into their bodies. Basically, if the 343 elites wore no pants, their junk would be flopping around, 2 big balls swinging back and forth every step.(I'm sorry) Although you must admit, those faces must be the sexiest thing you've seen your whole life
Diet and NutritionEditElites find it hard to eat due to the lack of a lower jaw, well, they are mandibles... It was recently suggested by the Arbiter that they start eating food using straws, but the only Elites who took this seriously were the Heretics. As a result, all Heretic Elites now wear retarded tank-looking things on their backs. This established tradition has now passed on to the Heretic Grunts.
Elites try to eat meat, fruit, shellfish, videotapes, Brutes, rocks, Gravity Hammers, Big Fuckers, Energy swords, Humans, and things that lose the game while breathing Gruntiness! Uh-oh.... These eating habits are simply experimental, as they are still trying to find a good, all-around food with good nutritional qualities. The only thing they eat consistently are Tomb Raider mousepads but, for some reason, they put condoms on their mandibles when they are eating them. Also, the food must be able to not fall out of their mouths every time they try to eat the thing. However the only thing they can eat now are nOObs.
Their drinks include but are not limited to:
- Coca Cola
- Jackass Blood (No, they're not vampires)
- Salt Water (It is believed that Salt Water Crocodiles are related to Elites)
- Liquid Crack
- Code Red Mountain Dew
- Meat Sauce ( perferbably Spaghetti meat sauce)
Elites are pretty laid back. They have been observed on Earth beaches, usually attempting to drink out of straws and go topless trying to temp human males but failing, all the while telling the Grunts to fetch them sandwiches. However, due to the lack of a chin, they get even more pissed off, and bite the Grunts which in turn, destroy the elite with their gruntiness.(Note: The insane number of teeth and lack of a chin has led to the most horrific oral cavity in the known, and quite possibly unknown, universe-and one hell of a dental plan)
Sometimes, an Elite will feel the urge to procreate, and is stricken with the hard truth once they find out that they can't find their boy/girl parts. Yet, even with this... oddity, they have managed to make billions of little baby Elites throughout the years (explained briefly in the next section). Elites are also known to dance around, carrying rainbow swords/stick things. Apparently, they are attracted to pretty colors. But then again, who isn't?
Also, the Elites have a term they use with their fellow Elite homies, the term is "squidface". Only Elites can use this term, if humans use the term they will get exposed to various slow and/or painful deaths They love killing
Through extensive investigation it has been found that Elites reproduce without easily observable parts because of their armor. Males in the military at a specific rank can gain the right to breed with any female of their choosing,(DAMN, they are lucky) so that they can "pass down their skills through genetics". (such a lame excuse for finding which bit to shove into her you-know-what.) They have a penis size standard size being 13 inches, with the all mighty thel vadam at 15 inches. They shoot hot pink jizz and if very healthy, they're cum will give of a little bit of a glowing effect, of course this lead some humans to become gay for elites. I wonder why someone would that hm?
If they are not however at a specific rank, they will then only have the ability to have anal sex, but the female has to choose them, poor Elites, atleast the Elites who don't get the sexual honor they deserve (no homo). Elites are very numerous woman giving birth to 94848132907489027890278942119878562594378024 ounch.
Elites put the suffix "ee" at the end of their names. At first, it was thought that this was some sort of special warrior name for the Elite. It's not. As it turns out, Elites hate the 4 lip thing they have going on, and thought that putting "ee" at the end of their name would give people the impression that they were "cute", rather than "OH GOD, HE HASN'T GOT A CHIN!!!" However, when they joined the human side, they removed the "ee" part of their names, possibly because they decided "Hey, let's at least sound scary. And that's how the humans won the war with the Covenant.Note that the Arbiter's name (from Halo Wars) is Shirley, or Shirl"ee", named after a famous Running Gun joke which nobody found funny until they read this sentence. Surely he can't be serious.
Armor PermutationsEditAfter watching the second episode of Arby N the Chief, the Elites realized that they would never receive special armor permutations such as Recon Armor or the elusive Katana.-fated attempt to cheer the Elites up, Bungie added the Commando shoulders to the Elites default armor list, hoping that n00bs would help to make the Elites feel less lonely .Sadly, the n00bs still wear their ODST or C.Q.B. Armor. Many scientists have theory that the only thing that Elite armor is good for would be in Team SWAT games (as it is near impossible to head-shot Elites from the back...wait...then why doesn't everyone just switch to Elites?!). Suspicously, the Elites also do t-bagging the best because they actually squat right down instead of go on their knees.
- A'dm (First Elite ever)
- 'Ve (First Elite)
- Thel 'Vadam (AKA the 309'th arbiter, AKA the one you play as)
- Ripa Moramee (Asshole Arbiter from HALO WARS)
- Rtas 'Vadum (half jaw)
- N'tho 'Sraom (Blue guy in Halo 3 co-op as the third player)
- Usze 'Taham (Red guy, fourth player)
- Otha' Letham (The Elite that contains the more Gruntiness than any other Elite)
- Jul 'Mdama ( A legitimately good evil Elite that hates the UNSC for killing his wife. Also the main bad guy in Halo 4 Spartan Ops, and stupidly killed off in Halo 5 on the FIRST LEVEL)
- Pawnee'noobsee ( Creator of Big Damn Heroes squad in the UNSC AND most hated Elite in halopedia YAY! ALSO Otha' Letham's unknown cousin o_0 but strangley hes the only elite with black armor).
- Maddi'slimanee (an insane sociopathic elite who pwns all on mythic and controls all prostitution)
- Ibeat 'Legendaree and his incompetent cousin, Faildat 'Eezee
- Zohm' Bee
- J'ohn Len'n (Elite who sang of anti war, happiness and flowers)
- Imsek 'See
- Sang 'Hielee (above's cousin, parents also dislexic)
- Halo 'Three (another cousin, family tradition)
- Halo 'Sea-ee (and another)
- Wort Wortee (You may think very unimagitive parents, but no, his name in English is Robert Mills.)
- Yuree 'Otanee (Human-looking scaredy-cat student who was unwillingly recruited to kick heretic aliens' asses)
- ROFL (Parents were very slow)
- HyHe 'Todee (User on this site)
- Lostmey Twinkee
- Plstaion 'three (Above's enemy)
- Lostma 'Testee
- Worty 'McWort (Famous for time-travelling, using a Dewortian.)
- King Wortwort Wortee the 5th (the fith king of Sanghelios.)
- Igota P'ee
- Paul 'Mcartnee
- Despicable 'Mee
- J'Suz Kusov
- Iprefer 'Callofdutee (executed for treason)
- Maree 'Curee
- Allurbaseare 'belongtomee (Ancient elite overlord)
- Okuro tamminee (Another User in this wiki)
- Doyouseewhat 'Isee (Christmas singer)
- Threfofree Ind'stees
- Bon jov'ee
- M'L Gee
Elite Ranks Edit
Main Ranks Edit
|Bungie||The real people behind the Elite leadership. Yes, vermin have controlled the ranks all along.|
|Satellite Dish||They eat burgers and sit around the Evil Council.|
|Freak Elite||It happened when a Councilor and a Honor Guard did it together.|
|Imperial Admiral||An Elite promoted for being imperialistic and sleeping with Truth. So, there's not many who want to be an Imperial Admiral.|
Other Ranks Edit
- Sith Lord
- Stupid plastic thing whose face only splits into three parts and has worm in it (also a Hunter rank)
- Pimpy Elite
|Testicle Chins | Xenomorphs | The big fluffy ones | Mods|
|Rockeaters (Those huge bastards with big guns) | Gigantasaurus Neverappearus|
|Space Wasps | Sniper Turkeys (Spartan Turkeys) | The little cute ones|